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Post by Baraka Obam on Oct 30, 2010 10:53:26 GMT -5
There is not one person here without some sort of connection to mind altering substance.
Man is a simple being, unlike a computer we are not loaded with all the programs we need to function, and our programs, fear, jealousy, hate, love, compassion are all compromised right from the beginning.
Over time we will aquire the knowledge to function correctly, at 18 we are a hollow core with little to work with, no real life tools, no money and no care that will be a staple to protect us.
Then we grow, just like a computer some times we multiply our errors, LOL, we can not seem to get away from self pity.
I read the bible and there is one part in there that stood out for me and that was Jobe, Jobe was rich, famous, had everything a man could want, then he was stricken, his family was killed, he lost his riches and a plauge came over his body, a plague of sores.
how did he get to this point, The devil went to god and said, your subject Jobe does not truly care for you, he is just beholding to you for all you have given him, take those things away and he will relent, he will curse you.
Well we know the rest of the story, kinda, Jobe did not curse god, but he did ask, why me god, why me, why didn't Jobe ask that when he was the rich and powerful, that is my question.
I have been to the top of the mountain, now the mountain has turned to fire, it seems there is no way to escape, I had to give up alot,
I had to give up all my pleasures it seemed, but now, after a long time I am seeing somthing that was not evident to me before.
There is more in importance in the way we act then I could have ever imagined, a simple smile is worth more to me now, so I try to get as many of them as I can.
I am not down on dkusner for his (trial drug abuse) on the contrary, he just needs to see all the blessings in his life and laugh off his torment.
Do not let pain and suffering destroy your being, adapt and become stronger.
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Post by dkushner on Mar 5, 2011 13:58:38 GMT -5
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Post by Jill on Mar 12, 2011 17:03:10 GMT -5
Thanks for the links Daniel! I agree with you that drugs, dope et al is a source of this scourge. No doubt about it. I've been following the case of Kyron Horman, the little boy that went missing in Portland, Oregon last year. Learning lots about Portland and Oregon. Seems that marijuana is a huge crop in those parts. The Mexican/Hispanic population has increased (double digit increases) in Oregon, as has crime. With that, I'm sure that 'M' has increased exponentially in that city and state. You have to wonder if the Mexican restaurants are another source? Strange world we live in these days. Jill Case in point: www.msnbc.msn.com/id/41786945/ns/health-addictions/drug addition disfiguring toll on users
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Post by dkushner on Aug 28, 2011 17:50:27 GMT -5
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Post by Lynn on Aug 28, 2011 18:32:33 GMT -5
dkushner
You may have something there. I had a job I was not suppose to do. I was shipping and receiving clerk for a store. I was always suppose to have a sedetary life. Well I got to crippled for that and another place that over paid me I turned to give them back their money and they kept asking me to work for them every time I went in. So it was a sit down job and I took it and had a lot of illegals working there from more then just Mexico. Well a year later I got to crippled for the sit down job and had to go on disability. Which just killed me sense I had such a high energy level. But before I lost the energy level I hit the front of my shines on a stool that I was standing on. It tipped and as I came off it hit the front of my shins and bruised bone deep. It took two years for those bruises to heal which is unusual and especially for me. Dr.s who did my hip surgery had always been surprised at my quick healing and same with regular illness. Illness hardly came along nor lasted very long.
From there after working that job I started loosing steam. I had thought it was my going crippled, my getting older. Of course slow healing bruises had nothing to do with that and did alarm me when I had that going on. I think that was my first real sign that something was starting to go wrong, but at the same time someone in their 40s could be at a point of needing supplements, but 2 years to heal from bruises is more then just a little bit of age difficulty.
The people I had worked with were hard workers. I ate with them. One of them would not bath and stank so bad that I had to sterilize the phone when ever he used it and anything else he touched. I would sterilize the rest room upon arriving and leaving and sometimes in between. So my situation would support your theory, but there are many who swear they got it from a bug bite. That seems to put us back to square one.
In Light Lynn
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Post by sheredelight on Aug 28, 2011 20:15:32 GMT -5
dhuskner, Yes it does seem quite feasible, after looking at both maps, thanks..
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Post by dkushner on Oct 3, 2011 11:31:36 GMT -5
What makes you think you are the only person here with problems, stop crying about days gone by and do somthing about the future. Life is hard, harder on some than others, but like a babys first step, so you must take this step. Stop blaming a bad child hood and abuse, nobody is abusing you NOW, what happens from now on is YOUR fault and nobody elses. What steps are you taking to get away from self abuse (DRUGS) and negative thinking? What are your plans to get yourself out of the pit? You have a job, thats alot more than many of the people here have or can even funtion at, then you do know there are people that are worse off and they work and keep a family going. I had to rent a car the other day, the man was in a perfect fitting suit, everything was perfect, but the young nice looking fellow was covered with sores . I am sure that this young man does not want to go out of his home but most likely its work or live outside. Right now I am blessed, but believe me, you do not want to swap pitty party stories with me, How bad is your morgellons? I'm letting other addicts know that there is a threat out there. What are you doing to help anyone else. If you don't like my posys don't read them. If you have nothing positive to contribute, or nothing good, or supportive to say, then read another post. - Daniel
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Post by dkushner on Dec 6, 2011 14:04:49 GMT -5
[quote author=lumpy board=theories thread=14392 How bad is your morgellons? [/quote]
Hi Baraka, My Morgellons? It's like the guy you described ... All 10 fingers are swollen with morg materrial and crud, all ten nails are very bad. I have open sores on my hands, and arms. Two weeks ago, I had a whole bunch of pustules develop (about 2" diam each, filled with puss). One in each ear, one on my schin, several on my arms and one on my butt. Two of these became infected, the doctor tested the infection part, it was staff. Some of the pustules expelled Morg material, one appeared to have a dead worm in it.
My problem is not just Morg. I got many parasitic infections at the same time that I was exposed to Morg, but because of the Morg symptoms I got diag DP, and have had to live with Morg and parasites from eigther Mexico or Central America.
I made a very bad mistake by relapsing. It is my own fault (not that I deserve to suffer like this).
Anyway, I am working now. The last two jobs I was fired from, the last one, I think because because the boss thaught I was dlusional piclking my skin. Two woemn co-workers used to sit in their cubes and laugh at me and make juokes thinking I could not hear it. The job after that I was fired because I relkapsed back into addiction because of the stress (no excuse, again my own responsibility). This job now is very difficult because when I started, one guy that was already there before me was at one of the companies that I was fired from and told everyone that I was an addict and all about my ugly fingers and my picking at it.
So, I'm doing my best, but it's not easy!! Thanks for asking, BTW, yes you are right. I am not the only one suffering, I need to start being supportive instead of complaining. I'm lucky to be working at all I suppose, else I'd be on the street, and I see many people on the street in SF with Morg nowadays!
The best of wishes to you.
- Daniel
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Post by Baraka Obam on Dec 6, 2011 20:48:57 GMT -5
Danny boy, its good your working, that is hard to do while working with this.
The hands are immence areas of pain if you treat them with somthing that does the job.
Hydrogen peroxide 35% is what I used on my hands, I also used rubber gloves good ones filled with the hottest water I could stand saturated with as much salt as the water would carry.
Then at night I would use plastic wrap with huge amounts of DESATIN on them in the morning I would scrub off the white dead skin with a green pad and treat the bleeding areas with hydrogen peroxide 35% untill it would stop bleeding.
This is more than painful, it rips at your soul, it was the only item that helped me over time to eradicate the seemingly indestructable material involved.
If your hands look that horrible wear some light gloves and tell the people at work you have a sensativity, allergy to chemicals, tell them they do not have to be in liquad form to harm you, just residue will do it.
Tell them the doctors say it will never heal unless you stop touching such things, tell them that even food has somthing in it that will break you out and untill the doctors find out just exactly what it is, your life is in danger.
It will be easy to have no issues with drugs or liquer when you realize, if you do it tomorrow you may look like a monster all over your body.
Its just plain time to stop, if you just have to do drugs have a doctor give you a script for your DOP. They may not be exactly to your likeing but neither will they further the spread of disease that could be aggravated or started by illicit drugs.
You really should just stop drugs and work on this issue.
If anyone tries to fire you because of your health issues make sure you keep a record of all the problems and tormentors, this can be used to make sure your compensated for what has been done to the ill.
Also, learn somthing, the world is filled with evil, just because a person speaks to you does not mean they need to know your lifes issues, if you have problems with drugs, that issue is yours, not theirs, sympathy talk, hardly ever results in sympathy.
Understanding you, that is your job, take the time to sit down with yourself and find out some important things, like, why do I take drugs, what makes me so weak I need them, what will help me avoid them, what can I do to become more understanding of your feeling, what can I do to make myself happy and smile.
Practice makes perfect.
Joining a gym with open sores is not a good idea, so, make it a point to address this issue, untill then use every emotion you have to do exersize in your own enviroment.
Severe exersize will have you looking and feeling better and zap you with endorphins that are powerful good feeling natural drug.
As you build your body up you will see things will come together
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Post by dkushner on Dec 17, 2011 14:48:44 GMT -5
Baraka, I am going to try what you have done with the gloves and salt. I have been taking saly and baking soda baths and it has helped, but what you did is much more direct and intense. Also, you are right, Morg does not like hydrogen peroxide. I don't know if there is some symbiotic relationship between the Morg and bacteria, but for some reason, killing the bacteria helps kill the Morg.
Also, thatnks for the support. I am clean and sober. Not for long though but I keep trying and right now things are getting better.
Thanks agein.
- Daniel
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Post by itzmajic on Jul 13, 2012 9:44:01 GMT -5
I don't know EXACTLY where my disease came from but figured i'd post here anyway.
I had a serious drug problem but i've been cleam off opiates for 3 years+ now. I noticed my symptoms 3+ months ago and i've been dabbling in amphetamines and the like. Well, I take adderall once a month (maybe, if that) and I have cooked up meth 3-5 times. It DOES seem when I take amphetamines or meth my symptoms come up tenfold. Maybe the chemicals or something push the morgellon's disease out more, I don't know? I haven't had the 'gel sweat' in a while we're all so familiar with until I did some adderall this weekend, 12 hours later I had the silicone sweat on my arms and fingers and had to take TWO back to back vinegar baths.
Hope we someday find the cure, and if we could just get DOP off the damn brain, we could show the younger generations problems that drugs cause, not just Morg's but everything else.
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Post by Baraka Obam on Jul 13, 2012 11:10:24 GMT -5
Hope things are getting better for you.
How are you doing with the drug problem my friend?
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Post by Lynn on Jul 13, 2012 11:51:37 GMT -5
itzmajic
I feel badly for you that the drugs probably made it just that much easier to be diagnosed as delusional. I appreciate you sharing that info here so others who may be in your shoes would know if they were crazy or not.
I have tried to help someone in Arizona who was a druggie and did not know what was wrong and I still wish there was a way to tell if it was just the drugs or if he has Morgellons. He is a real nice fellow, but all his symptoms disappeared while in jail for over a year. So now he is back to the same life style and asking for help again and I have no clue how to tell if he is sick from such a long distance. So frustrating and heart wrenching at the same time.
Thanks for any input and sorry you have Morgellons. In Light Lynn/TorpedoLynn
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Post by scabdraggr on Jul 13, 2012 12:22:29 GMT -5
When we turn to blaming each other for this mess then we have sunk to the lowest depth. To spout hate in the beginning of a post only to decrie hate at the end of the post is totally redundant.This type of denial of our own words shows just how little that some even listen to what they say. Blaming is the number one thinking error in our personality traits that sink us lower than what we need to be sunk.Turning on our fellow men and women is a new low in the cycles of Morgellons.What a shame for anyone to turn hate and ignorance into politics.
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Post by Baraka Obam on Jul 13, 2012 18:30:53 GMT -5
Scrap lad who blamed who for what here, I do not see it, there was a few people here talking about addiction, if you have ever been addited or close to any addicted person you will understand.
There is no help for addiction untill you realize YOU are the problem, not others, you can reach out with everything you have and will be left with only what can not be pawned.
The old posts are more tough love and reality, in the new post, itzmajic say he also had drug problems, sooo, I do not see the issue can you explain?
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Post by scabdraggr on Jul 13, 2012 18:56:51 GMT -5
reread you first reply.
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Post by itchin4answers on Jul 14, 2012 0:59:15 GMT -5
Ahh addicition...whether people want to hear it or not, we are all addicts in some shape or form. My newest addiction is ice-cream and my bust line and waist line aren't too happy with me. I won't even mention what my bowels think of me. I've been on this treadmill a long while, I remember the peanut butter addiction, but the ice cream is worse because it has all those nasties in it. Here's a little quote from a book called "Is there Really a Human Race" written by Jamie Lee Curtis & Laura Cornell - it's my sons book. "If I get off track when I take the wrong turn, do I make my way back from mistakes?"
"Do I learn."
"Is it a sprint? A dash to the end? Am I aware of the time that I spend? And why do I do it, this zillion-yard dash? If we don't help each other, we're all going to.......Crash".[/i] ....that IS the part that matters in my opinion. For those of you out there struggling with the smokes, the booze, the drugs, the food, the whatever's I found this link interesting... WE'RE CREATURES OF HABIT - ADDICTIONS AWARENESS
We are creatures of habit, at times guilty of silly little things we feel compelled to do each and every day to feel safe, secure and comforted. Those idiosyncrasies, like the need to take the same route to work, follow the same bedtime ritual, or make endless lists very often define who we are. What may be surprising is the compulsion we have to act in a certain way on a daily basis bears similarity to the trait seen in serious physical or psychological addictions to nicotine, alcohol, drugs, food, gambling, and a variety of other obsessions.
"Addiction and its negative affects are found everywhere, whether we are talking about a town of hundreds or a city of millions, said East Kootenay MLA Bill Bennett. "It's the cost and consequences of addiction that are not always apparent, but they are nonetheless enormous in terms of individual health, relationships, career, and personal finances. Addiction affects everyone and that's why the Province spends more that than $1 billion annually on mental health and addiction services."
Addiction in our province is one of the reasons Interior Health supports National Addiction Awareness Week from November 19-25 and efforts to bring attention to prevention, treatment and support services. "Although research shows B.C.'s smoking rate is the lowest in Canada, the tragedy is that 5600 BC smokers still die each year," said Cindy Kozak-Campbell, Acting Mental Health and Addictions Director for East Kootenay HSA. "While nicotine use may be lower in our province other research shows up to 200,000 British Columbians are likely experiencing problems related to alcohol consumption, and illegal drug use is known to be higher here than elsewhere in the country. "
Stopping or preventing addiction takes a determined effort by everyone concerned - individuals with addictions, their families and support networks. "Addiction issues are complicated," said Kozak-Campbell. "There is no magic bullet that will instantly take away your craving or compulsions." tinyurl.com/6p55z7v
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Post by itzmajic on Jul 14, 2012 9:30:27 GMT -5
Baraka, i'm doing great buddy, thanks for asking. I've been COMPLETELY clean, of every substance has been around 9 months except for prescription meds I took once during that time, I had a prescription for them and all. Cigarettes are the only thing I really indulge in anymore, that and caffeine....can't do it all at once, although i'm weening myself from soft drinks. I used to drink them almost obsessively, but once I discovered these symptoms and the potential link to GM foods, I started drinking juice almost religiously. Cigarettes will be the next thing after that if I can quit either completely, if I can't (which I have doubts) then at least ween myself down drastically.
My symptoms aren't near as frequent as they used to be, they seem to really only have HIT me the couple of times I did consider myself delusional, say 2 months or so of not much itching or anything even without alot of fibers coming out when I used the vinegar detox bath or so and started believing the 'DOP diagnosis bullshit' and then i'd stop with the watching my food/sugar intake, didn't worry about alkanlinity, just stopped doing what I was doing and after a week or so living how I used to live, diet and exercise wise i'd get a day or two of the 'silcone sweat' and crawling/itching sensations and this last time I had WAY more things exiting through my pores/landing on my skin however they did it AND my left eye's vision became blurrier and blurrier that day and I FINALLY after 4 detox bath's had ENOUGH relief to goto sleep when I woke up, my vision was back, the crawling/itching wasn't too bad (I started taking my usual herbs and spices for vitamins/nutrition again that morning for the first time) and I generally felt good.
So I don't know what causes this, or how I can get completely rid of it but I DO KNOW the drugs didn't make ME delusional or paranoid, they may have helped it infect me, lowering my immune systems and things but i've been clean this long and still having symptoms, I know it wasn't the drugs, I can't speak for alot of others, but the symptoms disappearing in jail may be because he was getting healthier in jail? Even though the food is terrible, people eat three square meals a day, they shower daily, they exercise some, they're not on drugs/smoking/drinking constantly, and it's been my experience that good health has low-no symptoms and bad health brings out the horrible parts of this disease, so you should be able to see symptoms with your own eye if it's pretty bad, since you know what to look for.
Thanks for all the well wishes, and to you all the same. One questions though, has anyone here tried NutraSilver? I was thinking of trying it, do you guys think it's worth a shot? 60 day money back guarantee...
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Post by Baraka Obam on Jul 14, 2012 10:42:41 GMT -5
I am glad your doing better Itzmajic with the drugs, more power to you.
Do you know that exersize releases endorphines and they can keep you safe from depression, but alas, exersize can become addicting, but its good for you.
Nutra Silver is a waste of money, the guy is a huckster.
Look up Nutra Silver SCAM, you will find he does not like to return your money, he only likes to take it
So called prescription drugs, NARCOTICS how is it the selling of these fall through the criminal conspiracy net when it comes to prosecution.
Why because that is what big phamacutical companys are all about, they will sell anything to anyone, they are the new drug dealers.
Is it not funny law enforcment has taken two decades to address this scorge on society, two decades thats a long time for the PILL MILLS to be making drug addicts out of Americans unnoticed.
Looks like BIG PHARMACUTICAL money can buy ambiguity from prosecution.
It is the INDIVIDUAL that will one day say, I want to live, that one simple sentence is what will open their eyes to the beauty of life.
Beating addiction, is a hard road at times and some may need the help of others not to slip back, still it is the addicts state of mind and not the helpers that change the direction of recovery one way or the other.
It is the value and strength of your life force that brings you back to safety anyone that has recovered knows that, the others, well, they call that form of healing denial.
Denial will always take you on a free ride back to hell, with that same stupid look on your face, asking, where is this train going anyway, when you know quite well you got on the train to hell!
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Post by Lynn on Jul 14, 2012 11:33:05 GMT -5
itzmajic
Thank you so much again for your input. I have really never been around anyone doing drugs so I am not sure what to look for but what you say makes sense. We are trying to save up to go to AZ to see my mom who was the one that got me in contact with the fellow. From my talking to her she thought this guy may have the same disease as me. I think I will try to find him and go see for myself what is happening to him. That way I can know for sure instead of guessing by phone or what other people say about him.
Hope you are able to beat those bad food addicts. Mine is coffee. When I was real sick I could barely handle any food or drink in normal amounts so once a week I would have one cup of coffee and it would make me so much buggier. Now that I am way more well I am able to do to much and controlling the coffee is very frustrating. It reminds me of when I use to drink soda all the time over 20 years ago. I became to sensitive to it and would make me swoon and feel weak. It scared me into not drinking it. I do get a little bit of a swoon if too much coffee, but not like the soda.
In Light Lynn/TorpedoLynn
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