Post by dkushner on Jun 4, 2011 0:25:08 GMT -5
Looks like no one posts here anymore. Is there a new site, or am I the only one left with Morg? I need to vent, that is why I put the SOAP BOX on he bottom - guess I'm mad, read if you are interested. I'm suffering alone and just need to put words to paper, so here goes.
Okay, now eight years since the Morgellons onset along with the onset of countless other bacterial and parasitic co-infections. Most of these are gone now but the Morgellons and some other infections still exist. Anyway, it makes it a bit easier to see just the Morgellons symptoms.
For the past several years, I have been experiencing a cycle of symptoms in the skin at my pubic area, and also, other different symptoms on my chins, my lower legs. I have itching on my lower legs ah comes and goes, and sores all over my lower legs that do not heal. I think I finally, linked the symptoms on my lower legs with the ones on my pubic area.
Every few months, something begins to develop in my groin area. It becomes itchy, then small white bumps develop all over my pubic area. These white bumps get a little bigger over the next several weeks. These bumps usually appear in hair follicles but there appear to be more bumps that follicles. If I remove a hair, I see tthat the whole root of he hair has some sort of cocoon around it. It is white and covers the whole root, all he way up to the surface of the skin, making the white bumps appear at skin level.
Some interesting things I noticed:
ONE - For years I have seen these symptoms and noticed that the hair, for his particular set of symptoms that I would remove seemed to have a severely damaged root. I looks like a golf club. I have seen photos from other Morg sufferers that have the same symptoms.
ONE.ONE: The root looks as though it had been melted or something. Another thing I noticed, the hairs appears to be hollow and often have white material inside the hair. Well, I removed a hair and finally see one of these hairs right in the middle of a pivotal time in the invaders cycle. This particular hair, on the club end, opened up and there is a white thing emerging from it. Also, I damaged he hair, right in the middle of the hair and can clearly see under the microscope, that he hair IS hollow and appears to be made up of some filaments. I'm wondering if it is actually a hair, or the invader itself in the hair-like stage. I do not know. I believe it is an infected hair in this case that is severely damaged, .
[NOTE: I have also noticed that I, as well as so many other Mog sufferers, have so many different symptoms. This has made it difficult for doctors to believe us. For instance the symptoms I am describing n ONE, are only symptoms related to one particular hair symptoms. There are other symptoms, with hairs exhibit completely different symptoms as well. For instance, I have a whole ogher set of symptoms for the hairs that sometimes cover/fill my ears. These hairs are always translucent, very stiff, have a pointed end, and they are much smaller.]
ONE.TWO: There are also thousands of what appear to be larva that are developing in the skin in my genital area. There are very many of these. In the past, when I could afford it, I have treated he area with permethrin during this sage and it killed he larva, leaving them hard after a couple days and very easy to see the extent of the infection and actually remove he dead microscopic larva. They are barely visible with the naked eye, but you need a microscope to see what they actually looks like. They look like a worm larva to me.
ONE.THREE: Also, in the past during this stage of this infection, I have seen a couple of other symptoms. I am not sure if they are part of his infection or part of another different Morgellons infection. In these cases, I see thousands of tiny microscopic tubes developing in the skin. Also, there are bright white egg-like objects that develop, again in the skin around the hair follicle. In these cases, I usually also see blue fibers with the tubes and egg-like things. One day a few months ago while I was removing some of this material and examining it, I accidentally grabbed something other than an egg-like thing as I was trying o remove. In this case I pulled out a long thin rubbery worm. I'm sure it was a worm. It was bright white and about an inch long from what I could tell. It was actually longer than that as I pulled it out of the skin but it appeared o be stretching while I was removing it.
That is when I connected the two sets of symptoms, my lower legs and my genital area. he itching in my legs was always worst just before I stared o see eggs and larva in the skin in my groin area, and just after I saw eggs and larva in the skin in my groin area. I believe that possibly, the worms are in my lower legs and move to my groin to reproduce, then they go back o my legs. This would explain why he permethrin seems to kill the infection in my pubic area but continues to re-appear every few months. I think we have to kill the parent worms wherever tthay might be to really kill the infection. I tried permethrin and ivermectin at he same imer and that really helped and I had none of these symptoms whatsoever for several moths, but eventtualy the symptoms did return.
[SOAP BOX]:
Personally, I believe that Morgellons disease has a worm component to it. I know that when I contracted Morgellons, I contracted many different infections all at the same time. These were bacterial, fungal and parasitic. Of the parasitic infections, all of them have been worm infections. I believe that Morgellons may be one of a number or related worms. There may be several different types of worms all from the same family and still unknown to science that case these Morgellons symptoms.
What is really shocking to me is that medicine knows so little about parasites in general. The way the doctors ac when you try to tell them what I have been experiencing you would think I was telling hem I saw a ghost, or a UFO or something. Parasites have lived on his planet for a very long time, much longer than we have. They DO exit, and they DO have unusual symptoms .. even the ones that science DOES know about. I had some worm infections that were clearly from a known species, with known diagnostic tests and accepted treatment options and yet, because I described Morgellons symptoms at the onset, I was never to receive any tests or treatment for the infections that they could have helped me with.
Another shocking thing is, how little medicine and science in general know about life on this planet. Some of the infections were generally what you might expect when you mention parasitic worm infection. On the other hand, Morgellons symptoms are very unusual and typically result in complete refusal by the doctor to even consider the possibility. As tithe infections grow much worse, the symptoms become more obvious and even leave a very large amount of material that could be used to confirm that we ARE suffering, but even in the midst of his, doctors will continue to refuse to believe it even in the face of evidence and proof. This, I believe is unprofessional, unethical, and in-human. In my case when tithe evidence becomes so obvious that even a doctor could see it, they simply refuse to see me, or will not look at the symptoms and evidence. hey will actually move their heads from left to right and vice versa so they are never looking in the direction of the evidence.
For awhile, I though that these doctors were cruel and waned to let me suffer. Maybe because they thought it was funny - I really could not understand i. But now I believe differently. Now, I'm thinking that they are just much more likely to let me continue to suffer than to risk having been wrong and not having attempted to run tests or treat me. This is again unprofessional, unethical, cruel and inhuman.
I started seeing a new doctor that is familiar with my case. Of coarse he believed he diagnosis’s that I am DOP. I talked with him over several appointments. I wrote a long letter describing my first here months with the onset of these infections so he could see the symptoms in context and also with he information of ho he doctors had treated me, refused o see me when I called describing visible symptoms, and mis-diagnosed me. Then I showed him photos that were very obviously parasites in my ears. Then I told him they believed that this was one of the reasons I am having neurological problems, I asked him to help me. Maybe he could not trea the morg, but could he help me with the infections that I still have left after having tried to treat this myself over tha past seven years, or possibly jus help me with the severe itching that I have every few monhs on my legs and groin. He never answered me. He just said, parasites will not kill you. I said nothing, but this is wha I was thinking:
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? Why do I have to suffer with treatable conditions. There are people all over the world getting treatment for infections that will not kill them. Why can’t I get help? I was no able to work for six years, and now that I can work, people that I work with will not even speak with me because all of my fingers and fingernails look like frankenstien. I can’t eat or sleep. I’m depressed, My nine year old does not understand all of this and has had o grow up watching me suffer. DO YOU KNOW WHY? I hink I know why, because he first few doctors made very big mistakes and his docor is not going to give me a diagnosis tha might jeopardize their reputations. What a hypocrite. Cause no harm, he knows that I have been suffering with parasites and bacterial infections for seven, almost eight years and that is has really hurt me ant ye he lets me continue to suffer. This particular doctor has thirty years sober in AA. I used to have en years clean and relapsed after back surgery and a bad divorce. It staryed with pain meds for chronic apin bug then I relapsed really bad, back to tar heroin. I got these infections all at the same time with a bad batch of this. I believe that is why the initial doctors allowed me o continue o suffer, maybe to teach me a lesson. At the time, seven years ago I wanted go get clean and put my life back together but it was too much for me so stay clean with all of these symptom and trying o get medical help and getting refusal after refusal for examinations, these and medication. The infecfions got so very bad. I did manage to stay clean for five monhs and then tried to ge medical help but hey still would not help me. I relapsed. I got clean again for tive months and tried to get help again, same thing. This has happened four or five time, then I saw his doctor and though it might be different because he was an alcoholic in recovery and I am an addict rying o get clean agai. Nope, he just told me that parasites will not kill me and tthat the first year of sobriety is physical recovery. WHAT DOES TTHAN MEAN, I GOT NO MEICAL TREATMENT FOR A YEAR – THEN WHAT, ANOTHER EXCUSE OTO LET ME SUFFER?
My whole view of the world has changed from this. Not just from being poisoned with bad drugs, but mostly it’s been the inhuman behavior of these doctors. They are uncompassionate, cruel and inhuman. Hey are liars and hypocritical and with all of these defects they still believe that they have the righ to judge me and find me not deserving of medication. What bothers me the most is that I will not lie to my nine year old. I did not want him to know about any of this. I tried to stay clean and get medical help for six years and I cannot get medical help. I have already explained to him the mistakes I have made but I’m afraid that if I tell him the truth about how he world really is., like the way doctors have treated me, I’m afraid of what this truth abou the world might do to him. I have hough of bringing him o the doctors office with me and asking the doctor why he will not help me … but no, I shouldn’t
Okay, now eight years since the Morgellons onset along with the onset of countless other bacterial and parasitic co-infections. Most of these are gone now but the Morgellons and some other infections still exist. Anyway, it makes it a bit easier to see just the Morgellons symptoms.
For the past several years, I have been experiencing a cycle of symptoms in the skin at my pubic area, and also, other different symptoms on my chins, my lower legs. I have itching on my lower legs ah comes and goes, and sores all over my lower legs that do not heal. I think I finally, linked the symptoms on my lower legs with the ones on my pubic area.
Every few months, something begins to develop in my groin area. It becomes itchy, then small white bumps develop all over my pubic area. These white bumps get a little bigger over the next several weeks. These bumps usually appear in hair follicles but there appear to be more bumps that follicles. If I remove a hair, I see tthat the whole root of he hair has some sort of cocoon around it. It is white and covers the whole root, all he way up to the surface of the skin, making the white bumps appear at skin level.
Some interesting things I noticed:
ONE - For years I have seen these symptoms and noticed that the hair, for his particular set of symptoms that I would remove seemed to have a severely damaged root. I looks like a golf club. I have seen photos from other Morg sufferers that have the same symptoms.
ONE.ONE: The root looks as though it had been melted or something. Another thing I noticed, the hairs appears to be hollow and often have white material inside the hair. Well, I removed a hair and finally see one of these hairs right in the middle of a pivotal time in the invaders cycle. This particular hair, on the club end, opened up and there is a white thing emerging from it. Also, I damaged he hair, right in the middle of the hair and can clearly see under the microscope, that he hair IS hollow and appears to be made up of some filaments. I'm wondering if it is actually a hair, or the invader itself in the hair-like stage. I do not know. I believe it is an infected hair in this case that is severely damaged, .
[NOTE: I have also noticed that I, as well as so many other Mog sufferers, have so many different symptoms. This has made it difficult for doctors to believe us. For instance the symptoms I am describing n ONE, are only symptoms related to one particular hair symptoms. There are other symptoms, with hairs exhibit completely different symptoms as well. For instance, I have a whole ogher set of symptoms for the hairs that sometimes cover/fill my ears. These hairs are always translucent, very stiff, have a pointed end, and they are much smaller.]
ONE.TWO: There are also thousands of what appear to be larva that are developing in the skin in my genital area. There are very many of these. In the past, when I could afford it, I have treated he area with permethrin during this sage and it killed he larva, leaving them hard after a couple days and very easy to see the extent of the infection and actually remove he dead microscopic larva. They are barely visible with the naked eye, but you need a microscope to see what they actually looks like. They look like a worm larva to me.
ONE.THREE: Also, in the past during this stage of this infection, I have seen a couple of other symptoms. I am not sure if they are part of his infection or part of another different Morgellons infection. In these cases, I see thousands of tiny microscopic tubes developing in the skin. Also, there are bright white egg-like objects that develop, again in the skin around the hair follicle. In these cases, I usually also see blue fibers with the tubes and egg-like things. One day a few months ago while I was removing some of this material and examining it, I accidentally grabbed something other than an egg-like thing as I was trying o remove. In this case I pulled out a long thin rubbery worm. I'm sure it was a worm. It was bright white and about an inch long from what I could tell. It was actually longer than that as I pulled it out of the skin but it appeared o be stretching while I was removing it.
That is when I connected the two sets of symptoms, my lower legs and my genital area. he itching in my legs was always worst just before I stared o see eggs and larva in the skin in my groin area, and just after I saw eggs and larva in the skin in my groin area. I believe that possibly, the worms are in my lower legs and move to my groin to reproduce, then they go back o my legs. This would explain why he permethrin seems to kill the infection in my pubic area but continues to re-appear every few months. I think we have to kill the parent worms wherever tthay might be to really kill the infection. I tried permethrin and ivermectin at he same imer and that really helped and I had none of these symptoms whatsoever for several moths, but eventtualy the symptoms did return.
[SOAP BOX]:
Personally, I believe that Morgellons disease has a worm component to it. I know that when I contracted Morgellons, I contracted many different infections all at the same time. These were bacterial, fungal and parasitic. Of the parasitic infections, all of them have been worm infections. I believe that Morgellons may be one of a number or related worms. There may be several different types of worms all from the same family and still unknown to science that case these Morgellons symptoms.
What is really shocking to me is that medicine knows so little about parasites in general. The way the doctors ac when you try to tell them what I have been experiencing you would think I was telling hem I saw a ghost, or a UFO or something. Parasites have lived on his planet for a very long time, much longer than we have. They DO exit, and they DO have unusual symptoms .. even the ones that science DOES know about. I had some worm infections that were clearly from a known species, with known diagnostic tests and accepted treatment options and yet, because I described Morgellons symptoms at the onset, I was never to receive any tests or treatment for the infections that they could have helped me with.
Another shocking thing is, how little medicine and science in general know about life on this planet. Some of the infections were generally what you might expect when you mention parasitic worm infection. On the other hand, Morgellons symptoms are very unusual and typically result in complete refusal by the doctor to even consider the possibility. As tithe infections grow much worse, the symptoms become more obvious and even leave a very large amount of material that could be used to confirm that we ARE suffering, but even in the midst of his, doctors will continue to refuse to believe it even in the face of evidence and proof. This, I believe is unprofessional, unethical, and in-human. In my case when tithe evidence becomes so obvious that even a doctor could see it, they simply refuse to see me, or will not look at the symptoms and evidence. hey will actually move their heads from left to right and vice versa so they are never looking in the direction of the evidence.
For awhile, I though that these doctors were cruel and waned to let me suffer. Maybe because they thought it was funny - I really could not understand i. But now I believe differently. Now, I'm thinking that they are just much more likely to let me continue to suffer than to risk having been wrong and not having attempted to run tests or treat me. This is again unprofessional, unethical, cruel and inhuman.
I started seeing a new doctor that is familiar with my case. Of coarse he believed he diagnosis’s that I am DOP. I talked with him over several appointments. I wrote a long letter describing my first here months with the onset of these infections so he could see the symptoms in context and also with he information of ho he doctors had treated me, refused o see me when I called describing visible symptoms, and mis-diagnosed me. Then I showed him photos that were very obviously parasites in my ears. Then I told him they believed that this was one of the reasons I am having neurological problems, I asked him to help me. Maybe he could not trea the morg, but could he help me with the infections that I still have left after having tried to treat this myself over tha past seven years, or possibly jus help me with the severe itching that I have every few monhs on my legs and groin. He never answered me. He just said, parasites will not kill you. I said nothing, but this is wha I was thinking:
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? Why do I have to suffer with treatable conditions. There are people all over the world getting treatment for infections that will not kill them. Why can’t I get help? I was no able to work for six years, and now that I can work, people that I work with will not even speak with me because all of my fingers and fingernails look like frankenstien. I can’t eat or sleep. I’m depressed, My nine year old does not understand all of this and has had o grow up watching me suffer. DO YOU KNOW WHY? I hink I know why, because he first few doctors made very big mistakes and his docor is not going to give me a diagnosis tha might jeopardize their reputations. What a hypocrite. Cause no harm, he knows that I have been suffering with parasites and bacterial infections for seven, almost eight years and that is has really hurt me ant ye he lets me continue to suffer. This particular doctor has thirty years sober in AA. I used to have en years clean and relapsed after back surgery and a bad divorce. It staryed with pain meds for chronic apin bug then I relapsed really bad, back to tar heroin. I got these infections all at the same time with a bad batch of this. I believe that is why the initial doctors allowed me o continue o suffer, maybe to teach me a lesson. At the time, seven years ago I wanted go get clean and put my life back together but it was too much for me so stay clean with all of these symptom and trying o get medical help and getting refusal after refusal for examinations, these and medication. The infecfions got so very bad. I did manage to stay clean for five monhs and then tried to ge medical help but hey still would not help me. I relapsed. I got clean again for tive months and tried to get help again, same thing. This has happened four or five time, then I saw his doctor and though it might be different because he was an alcoholic in recovery and I am an addict rying o get clean agai. Nope, he just told me that parasites will not kill me and tthat the first year of sobriety is physical recovery. WHAT DOES TTHAN MEAN, I GOT NO MEICAL TREATMENT FOR A YEAR – THEN WHAT, ANOTHER EXCUSE OTO LET ME SUFFER?
My whole view of the world has changed from this. Not just from being poisoned with bad drugs, but mostly it’s been the inhuman behavior of these doctors. They are uncompassionate, cruel and inhuman. Hey are liars and hypocritical and with all of these defects they still believe that they have the righ to judge me and find me not deserving of medication. What bothers me the most is that I will not lie to my nine year old. I did not want him to know about any of this. I tried to stay clean and get medical help for six years and I cannot get medical help. I have already explained to him the mistakes I have made but I’m afraid that if I tell him the truth about how he world really is., like the way doctors have treated me, I’m afraid of what this truth abou the world might do to him. I have hough of bringing him o the doctors office with me and asking the doctor why he will not help me … but no, I shouldn’t