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Post by kiki on Aug 17, 2008 18:44:21 GMT -5
I have a case of the blues. My anniversary was last wk. 14 years and he still makes my heart skip. But morgellons did more than invade my body. It insidiously wove itself into the "us" so slowly that it wasnt apparent till it was already done. It killed. It killed the spontaniety, it killed the flirtation, it killed the easy chitchat. Its the elephant in the room. There -- always there. The nights on the porch sharing our "One day we gotta...do this, go there,try that" Gone. The unspoken fears wont allow such frivilous dreaming. What we dont say is that its too painful to dream. We dont say we are afraid. I see it I hear it I taste it. We are afraid to acknowlege that the being that was US is no more. But we still cling. Fumbling for new footing. We "give" each other songs every year. I gave him the Sting/Sheryl Crow song - Always On Your Side. I know how to email a youtube video but dont know how to post it here. It just seemed fitting for morgellons and love. my heart hurts.
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Post by gradysghostii on Aug 17, 2008 19:17:40 GMT -5
Kiki, my heart breaks for you, I'm trapped in total fear too, especially now with all this worm talk on lymebusters, I'm horrified that that is what I am feeling inside of me. I'm married, but my "being" is hollow now, I cannot think about the future, it's enough to get through the now, I have been married 18 years, 3 children, but I am being eaten alive by parasites it would appear, nobody cares, how horrid. My heart hurts physically too, but it's broken.
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Post by angela on Aug 17, 2008 20:40:29 GMT -5
My heart aches for you both. I dont know what that's like to have a partner through this nightmare. I wonder how it would be to be able to share with a partner who understands and then i also wonder about those whose partners do not understand/believe what is happening to them. I am alone and wish to share with someone that cares about me and i them.
Yesterday for the first time my brother actually LISTENED. When the conversation was over he was so facinated he said he had wished we could have recorded the conversation. It was a good feeling.
Please.......work at alkalizing your bodies and keep active and you will become healthy again. The spontaniety & fun will return to you.
Grady... I wish so much i could reassure 100% that you dont have actual worms in your body. I dont believe for a second there is even one worm in any of our bodies. I know it doesnt make it true just that i believe it. But it is still true ;D
As GOD is my witness.....someday you will KNOW that this much is true. No worms!
Just Protozoal.
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Post by Carrie♥ on Aug 17, 2008 21:50:46 GMT -5
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Post by kamefromsky on Aug 17, 2008 22:52:00 GMT -5
like it or not, you eat three to five pounds of insect parts a year.
little protein never hurt anyone.
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Post by godsgrace on Aug 17, 2008 23:13:31 GMT -5
kiki
It's all in the perspective.
I refused from the beginning to let this "thing" ruin my life.
I figured if I did, then "IT" wins.
I'm a sore loser.
Don't get me wrong.. we all have our days and I certainly had mine. It nearly killed me, more than once.
wishing you peace and love...and lots of it
godsgrace
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Post by justhanginin on Aug 18, 2008 9:02:48 GMT -5
Kiki, I sure can relate to what you are saying. I miss the spontaneity between my hubby and me like crazy. This disease sure is a mood-killer. I try to keep from spreading this to anyone else but it sure gets lonely.
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Post by lilsissy on Aug 18, 2008 20:45:30 GMT -5
I don't know what to say but I am praying that you will feel each other's and GOD'S LOVE so bright that everything else is as a grain of salt.
Somethimes this is hard to do but sometimes it as if the HOLY SPIRIT does it for you.
Thank You,,, HOLY SPIRIT
Jennifer
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Post by grsue on Aug 19, 2008 1:06:17 GMT -5
I am having the same sort of reaction to the idea of worms -highly unsettling to think it could be worms. All the possibilities about this being in food, vaccines, airborne, or inflicted upon unsuspecting folks like us is horrid, but then to read the thread about microsoft, and sensors, just crosses all lines with me,... and because we don't know what this is, the possibilities scare me, just as it does you. No doubt it is horrid and we feel very alone in our private hell with this crap. Bad days come and go-tomorrow might be better. Get some rest and sleep.Take a nice smelling bath/shower. Be nice to yourself before you turn in tonight.
Those feeling distance between you and your mates, do whatever it is that you feel lacking. Just do it- Talk as you used to, do things together, this IS something you HAVE control over. You have control over how much you talk about this, think on it, attend to it. Attend to that which is most important to you and your life. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? Maybe a cure?
I've been married almost 27 years. If you need ideas on how to just get back on track-I recommend the Light his/ her/ your fire program. Basically just do' it-' what ever it is that is lacking. have fun, love, laugh. fake it till you make it ...If there is an elephant in the room, it's because you let him in the door.
those 'without a partner to go through this with'- I know what you mean, -you want understanding and compassion that is real-but no one can make this better for any of us.It's true, as things stand today, not knowing what it is, it's frightening and upsetting for us all. but,... No spouse wants to hear it or deal with it all that much, so, from experience, I would say,shush up, at home and work, and be what you seek. Go be a friend/a companion to someone ,but listen to other problems within reason, or you will overload ,if you are carrying around your own worries plus theirs.
Have you read Tony Robbin's books? I love his idea of"what can I do to make this better/easier to take, right now?" He once had a ton of phone messages , all to return asap, and he sat in a hot tub and returned his calls , all while enjoying it. So, apply it to what you're doing.
Do what you can about this Morgs, then leave it ,and focus on someone else , and other stuff in your life that you enjoy doing and being. ignore it(morgs) as best you can- and I know how hard that is; scratching and itching, and full of lesions myself, and not much energy. but my husband and family do not want to hear it, or see me do it.Makes others feel uncomfortable.
Make your honey's day better tomorrow. Hugs , grs
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Post by robertalouise26 on Aug 19, 2008 2:18:00 GMT -5
Dear grsue thank you for a very very good post an excellent philosophy but hard to live up to. Which can be very very difficult at times. Love and best wishes. Roberta.
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