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Post by zabrubon on Jul 16, 2010 0:04:53 GMT -5
I don't know if it's me or what but I feel like we don't have fun on this board anymore. I feel like we are all drifting away from each other. Please someone tell me it ain't so. I needs to know. I know I have been away working trying to make ends meet. Maybe that is the same for all of us. I don't know. We've lost a few and others seem to have moved on to other boards. We used to be so close. The way we were. I miss you all and pray for us. I pray we can all stay together until the end. I pray we can be there for each other always. I love you all. Missing you, ChicagoBonnie
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Post by friskers on Jul 16, 2010 1:23:21 GMT -5
God Bless you Bonnie for sharing your feelings . ive been feeling apathetic about the board for a very long time now although I still come here every day I only a couple threads that spark my interest. I dont know what it is . Maybe after being on morg boards for going on 7 years now it just isnt that interesting to me anymore. I also wish it were more helpful to people who come here looking for releif of symptoms . I guess if we want it to change we have to be part of the change ourselves ? Id love to see more fun on the board too of course !
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Post by freaky on Jul 16, 2010 3:05:27 GMT -5
I'll try to do this gently. Yes my dearest darling Chicago Bonnie, we are drifting apart. One thing though, we seem to be all very sick right now.With such a large group, it appears there are divisions occurring, forming smaller groups within, that have differing opinions, causing bickering, that no one appreciates. Each group supports each other. It's sad, but it's part of the sociological scheme of things that just happens. It would be nice if there were more respect for other's feelings, especially when they are not fully aware of certain situations that occur, and much that happens ends up like the whispers game. I have faith that someday this may improve, but you just can't say. I have been guilty myself of messing up as well, but I can say I'm not a participant in any group. I am getting paranoid that I may say the wrong thing, & if so please excuse me. I have unintentionally made a mistake in one of my posts lately. The stress of this disease has added to the lack of caring, & forgiveness. We certainly miss you though, at least I do. I hope you are happy, and not as sick as some of us. Much love, luck, & good health to you, freaky
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Post by zabrubon on Jul 16, 2010 13:33:09 GMT -5
Friskers, and Freaky, some of my favorite people. Thank you for your good response. I think if there are groups here that is ok as long as we don't think one group is better than another. I really wish we were all one. Can we join hands? I have learned that a house divided can not stand. Will we allow our board to be divided? Do we have an enemy amoung us? If so, not to worry, God will seperate the wheat from the chaff. Just let it go. Regardless of the differences of opinions of why we are sick or how to get better, we all are ill with this disease and we need to stick together. It's ok to think different. It's ok to be different and it's ok to live differently. Come on back and let's be lovers again. I miss all our fun times. The way we were. ChicagoBonnie.
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Post by bannanny on Jul 16, 2010 16:27:40 GMT -5
Well... there's a whole lot of shakin and rockin and rollin goin on here anyway! We had a pretty good jolt of an earthquake this morning... guess you could say it was fun since it bounced us around in bed a little! ha! Nah... don't mean to sound like I don't feel what you're sayin Bonnie, cuz I do. Just tryin to make you laugh a little cuz I don't want you to feel sad.
I hear what you're sayin tho... things have seemed a bit topsy turvey on the board lately. We need to lighten up a little and do what we do best for each other... which is to love each other big bunches. I think we still do tho... but sometimes everyone gets another bad cycle or gets involved in something they're researching or whatever and we lose touch sometimes. But I don't think it means anything's changed deep down inside... I know nothing's changed for me anyway. I'm always gonna be here and I'm always gonna love each and every one of you with all my heart. We're family... and we're always gonna be one no matter what! You just gotta let people go thru whatever it is they're goin thru... and know in your heart they're still the same people they always were. We've got some really beautiful hearts here too... I doubt anything is ever gonna change that! So chin up Bonnie my friend... nothing's really changed, just gotten a bit off track is all.
I love you guys ~~ bannanny
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Post by morghunter on Jul 16, 2010 17:29:29 GMT -5
Sadly enough its true what's happening lately but it may be the result of any number of things. Bad air from the gulf,the sun's electromagnetic storms,dare I say haarp,who knows? One thing is sure,most of us is unusually ill. Some may be just recharging,chewing on what skizits has dropped in our lap. We still care about each other and how we can beat this horrible disease. Group hug everyone.Morghunter.
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Post by rhorn2006 on Jul 18, 2010 0:29:37 GMT -5
Hi CB,
I seldom stay "on-line" for more than a couple of minuets a day anymore.. For the past 6 months or so, I have felt drained.. This hot weather is really draining.. The summers in Tennessee used to never get any hotter than the low 80's.. Over the past 10 or so years it has gotten hotter every summer.. Now it reaches over 100 on a clear day..
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Post by zabrubon on Jul 18, 2010 2:24:54 GMT -5
Hey Nanners, glad to hear from you. How you be? How's the love life? You are right, we all really do care about each other on this board. I was just worried that everyone left. However, now I am startin to see some familar faces. I sure hope someone somewhere will help us overcome this. I have been down to almost no minocycline and then wham, I get sick with sore throat. It is so humid and hot and I have not been using my A/C and then all of a sudden lately I get this outbreak of little tiny red marks, smaller than a pin head all over my chest and arms. What is that all about. Then of course, the litle black seeds popping out here and there on my arms and chest. I am freaked out. What the heck. I think it's the low dose med's(meds are over a year old) and the heat drawing this out of me. I am starting to have the biting feeling too. Ugh! Now back to the abendezole and doctor. Shoot! I had not been to doctor in a year. Anyway, that heat is drawing it out. So enough of me, glad to see you are Old faithful and always on board. Hope your having a great Saturday night. I was asked out for a drink but I felt so lousy I had to turn it down. Too bad for me. It would have been fun to sit with a man again. sighhhhh! Take care my friend. Love ya lots. CB
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Post by zabrubon on Jul 18, 2010 2:29:29 GMT -5
Morg hunter, you know your right, there is some nasty weather conditions out there lately. I am starting to break out again. I mean I look ok but if you get up close with the magnify glass there is weird things going on with my skin. Gotta be something in the air. Thanks for the hugs, I think a lot of us needed it. Hugs back, CB
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Post by zabrubon on Jul 18, 2010 2:35:25 GMT -5
Hey Rhorn, good to see that good lookin face of yours on board here. I think I am speaking for all the girls here. Ha! Sorry to hear that you are not feeling well. What the heck. Do you think its really the heat? Wally used to live in the hot weather, then he got married and moved to Canada and I understand his skin is much better. I think you are correct, the heat is draining us. Don't be a stranger here, there are many women here that love to hear your voice and we all enjoy your sense of humor too. Take care my friend. Hugs, CB
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Post by jody on Jul 18, 2010 10:33:30 GMT -5
HEY,bonnie i dont get on line that much since my cancer...dont feel well enough but i do think about all of you good people.i had my last chemo in may.and i think it helped my itchy skin,now with my hair coming back i started itching again.i have wegners too.so i just dont know from day to day what is going on. but i thank god everyday for my life.and all that he does for me....may god bless all of my good friends here on this board!!!!!!!!!
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Post by toni on Jul 18, 2010 15:10:00 GMT -5
Jody, you keep hangin tough. Wegener's. Yes, that's come up a few times. I wonder how many others of us might have that too. Are you taking Bactrim? I don't understand Wegeners much and it seems odd that an antibacterial can keep it at bay, which that makes it seem as though bacteria is involved. Probably is, and I just don't know enough about it. Take care Jody.
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Post by zabrubon on Jul 19, 2010 2:00:46 GMT -5
Jody, thank you for writing me/us back. I am sorry you are going through this. I don't know what Wegners is but I know chemo. Please take it easy and know we love you. I am putting you at the top of my prayer list. He has it all under control. I sometimes don't understand His way. He says that His ways are not our ways! Isn't that the truth. Know I am praying for you. How are other things in you life? Family and friends there for you? Please let me know how you are. Blessings to you, ChicagoBonnie
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Post by cyn on Jul 19, 2010 4:54:53 GMT -5
Hi Bonnie,
It is true for me also, initially I stayed away for longer periods as I felt worse and life in general became harder. But, there was a growing idea in my mind and it finally made no sense for me to continue on the board. Very few experience what I do. And vice/versa. I always tried to speak to newcomers, but that was my limit as far as being useful here. When I'd mention a new symptom, "the powers that be" might actually be paying attention. I do not want to help their research in any way, or let them know just how well they did their job on me. It got to the point where it felt very selfish to talk of my developements because, who was it helping but me? Like, right now, I feel the need to tell the board what is happening, but I know in my heart it will not make life any better for any of my fellow sufferers, but it will put a smile on the faces of the creeps who engineered this stuff.
It is not easy either, to hear of another fellow losing their battle, when I would so much rather take their place for them. Yes, the Hot weather will greatly affect a person once Morgs has taken over, so to speak. Because at that point your skin has thinned greatly and you simply don't have the protection from heat that we were born with. Also for some reason, my sweat burns like crazy sometime. I am guessing they are new holes made by Morgs or its a heavy load of bacteria, something like that. I am just now starting to perspire out of the right side of my head again. For years now it has all come from my left temple area. Seemed really strange to me and I always wondered if peoples were noticing.
Take good care Bonnie, and thank you for trying to keep everyone together.
Love to all, cyn
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Post by 22122agin on Jul 19, 2010 13:23:43 GMT -5
Chicago Bonnie, I would say that is true for whatever reason. If there are new people signing up, they maybe feel it is too closed a group. Not many new people post. Maybe not many of the new folks know about Lyme Busters. Just a thought that somehow we might be issolated through search engines for Morgellons or skin rashes. I am not into research much but just wanting to have a more normal life. Some specualtion is ok but maybe that turns new people off that are new that are seeking practical things. Yes, they can search the archives. As someone here pointed out we are in stressful times throughout with Castro predicting a bomb. Lots of stress all around with the oil catastrophe and we struggle with our host vehicle that no one knows in terms of experts how to fix. I am sorry you feel alienated. I took a break for a couple of years and then came back. Can't hurt. Sending you happiness in the universe, blessings and glimpses of Heaven on earth. Best, 22122
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Post by zabrubon on Jul 20, 2010 3:15:58 GMT -5
Cyn, so glad to hear your voice. I hear what you are saying. You sound like a nice person that is having an tough time of it, probably like many of us. I have been hanging on my a thread myself since I got sick. It has not been easy. Tough times for sure. Going it alone has doubled my sadness at times. I made up my mind a few years back to will myself out of bed and keep going. I told myself I could lie there and die or I could fight. So I dragged my beaten body from the mattress and began to fight. I told myself i was the only one here on earth who would fight for me, so I had to do it. Otherwise Well you know how i feel. I have done though so much. OMG. I have lost jobs, over and over. The last one I was let go of told me I could no tdo the job. And you know what, I couldn't. I was just overwhelmed. They did not know what iwas going through. I did not tell them. Oh well, it was good money for thiry days. My dear Cyn, I think you are important and I think that what you have to say means something. I don't always answer every post that people write, or read every post, I just can't it's too hard to do. So i graze. I answer when i can. You are important and I think you have a good way of putting your thought s on paper. That's a gift. I pray for your world. I pray that you get a job that you like and that can pay some bills. I pray for you. You sound like a strong minded person and so, you will go on in life for sometime. I pray you better health and please share with us. We hear you. We care, I care about you. May God Almighty be your strength now and forevermore. Remember, He loves you with an everlasting love. Grace and peace to you. ChicagoBonnie
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Post by zabrubon on Jul 20, 2010 3:26:41 GMT -5
22122, hello and welcome back. I think you are correct, people that are new on board may not like a lot of research and maybe are intimidated. i know i was scared to talk. I was thinking, omg these may be weirdos on board. Can I trust them. I was scared. But I was so sick that I finally started to ask questions and put myself out there. I don't know why we are all sick with this disease, but it has to do with the pollution of our enviroment. You can take that to the bank. for sure! Thank you for writing. I thank God we can all in one way or another help support one another. I feel so sad that I can't help more people. Especially the ones that drift away because they can't afford the internet and are so sick. Oh what becomeseo f them. Do we forget them? I hope that each person on line here would have at least one other person whom them have made friends with and that person keeps tabs on them somehow, someway. I would hate to lose everything i have and like walking in space, drift away from the world of Morgellons and die and no one knows or cares. That hurts my heart to think of it. I am glad you are here and i pray for you, for this board, for myself, for help and for God to have mercy on us all.. May He break open the sky with scientists and doctors and concerned people for our cause. I pray blessings upon your life. Take care and God bless, ChicagoBonnie
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Post by fritolay66 on Jul 20, 2010 20:30:24 GMT -5
Bonnie,
I just think every sufferer is tired of sufferin with no answers from our professionals. And I really do believe our family still exists here. A little new structure perhaps and some new additions, along with the heartfelt losses we have endured lately. Just like any close family, when things are bad for most, then the entire family feels it. When things start to look up, then everyone jokes around a bit more. Something newer on the current horizon is the economy and just how badly it is hitting everyone including our sufferers, making things that much tougher.
What a nice thread to read the input from everyone. All of it is a reflection of just what a good close family this is. The good times will reappear again.
Frito
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