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Post by karen2829 on Aug 13, 2005 15:21:46 GMT -5
Hello Everyone
Name is Karen, I have been " around" for about 3 months now , it has taken this long to build the nerve to admit I can not do this alone.
I have been ill for 4 months, it began the moment I moved in to my new apartment so this is the where I contacted this disease. At first I was optimistic, I reached out to my family and friends for help. Unfortunatly I would only make it 5 minutes into any conversation before I noticed the look on their face as if I was completely insane. I am so embarrased and fearful now, I have not seen a doctor. Being that my doctor is the person entrust with my life, having him doubt me or say I am dilusional will only thrust me deeped into the hole I have buried myself into.
To be honest I don't know why I am writting this post, I know the things I need to do ( baths, cleansing, etc) and for the last 3 months I do my baths as per my outlined routine taped to my fridge. I am tired....
My life has become just like one long bath. All Day, Everyday , I think of what I can add to my baths in order to finally find more than 5 minutes of relieve. It feels like I am running around either with a vacuum in hand or a bottle of amonia water. I clean everyday before work , after work, before shower ... yet I still get attacked by " invisibles insects" when I go to put on my lotion.
The worst part.... ohh yeah it got worse. My cats ( have had them for 10 years ! ) are now dying. I just paid usd 1000.00 less than 2 weeks ago to save my cat after I found her almost lifeless on my couch. She was suffering from an infection to her Pancreas ( huh ?? ) from an unknown reason. The vet said it was a virus she could of picked up from another cat. My cats are indoor cats so since it was another cat.. she is probably dilusional just like her owner. Seeing my poor animals with scabs on their bodies , paranoid from these " invisible" insects that are biting them the icing to this cake. Right now they are both in my room , sleeping on 2 shoe boxes ( since they now won't get near my bed, clothes etc) and I wish I had the money and miracle cure for them. This past week, it has been the sadness in their eyes that made me take my baths and clean this house.... It has been a bad week.
" THIS TOO SHALL PASS KAREN !! " is written in red marker on my monitor..... I hope so... I hope....
Well it's bath time.... thanks for listening to my pitful attempt to feel sorry for myself. I am just feeling sad and my computer is the only thing I know that does not judge what I write or say....
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Post by Administration on Aug 13, 2005 18:57:09 GMT -5
Karen, Im so sorry. I know how hard this is.. and I felt the same way you do now when it started for me.. No one else in my home was affected so it was harder. How could I tell everyone some invisable thing was crawling and biting me while I slept right in the same bed with my husband, and other nights with my daughter, and they were feeling nothing at all. Dont think Ive ever felt so alone and scared in all my life. Whats worse is I had been sickly and getting sicker for years before this all happened with 1 symptom after another that Doctors couldnt explain.. so like you I surely didnt want to tell them "I think Im now infested with bugs".. Do you have physical problems as well Karen? I had severe back problems.. spasms that would come and not leave.. my back was ard like a turtle shell. I was tired all the time.. having a rough time remembering things, had numbness and tingling in my left arm and hand.. horrible headaches and a stiff neck.. And the lymphnodes on my collar bones were huge.. They tested me for everything back then.. well.. everything but Lyme disease..The one thing they should have looked for. I have now chronic Lyme disease. My thyroid and immune system have been hit hard. Many people have written me on here for a Lyme literate Dr in their area and I ask them to write me back and let me know the results and so far everyone who has written back has been positive for Lyme.. I dont really think thats the whole answer.. but Lyme hits the immune system so maybe it has something to do with that? In any case.. you arent alone. My heart breaks that you have to watch your cats sick.. I have 3 and luckily none have gotten this.. but I can only imagine how this makes you feel. Please feel free to write any of us to talk if you need to. I am Lymebusters@webtv.net Patti is Lymebusters@yahoo.com
The others you can click on their post I believe to send them a message if you want to contact them.. Many are trying something from a Dr named Swartz.. I hope they will jump in here to give you the info.. They seem to think this is helping them.. Others can offer herbals and suppliments and such that they feel helped them as well. I was on the antibiotic Rifampin when the Morgellon symptoms vanished for me.. dont know if there is a connection or not there but so far they havent returned (knock on wood). We are all here to help anyway we can. Dont feel like you are alone.. I promise you arent.
Kerry
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Post by debbie on Aug 13, 2005 20:16:50 GMT -5
Hi there Karen
So glad you finally posted your story, no one should have to go through this torture alone. At least you are where people will beleive you. Your a big animal lover & I am so sorry to hear how sick your cats are. One thing I remember reading by JWF was putting his dogs on Cats Claw & in no time they were back to normal. I was wondering if this type of immunity builder would help your cats, we may have lost those old posts..... also for the environment he used menthol crystals (I think).... Your cats are getting older & of course there immunity would be lowered (could be worth a try)... Take care Karen & keep in touch.......
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Post by rickndebby on Aug 13, 2005 20:49:24 GMT -5
Karen, Debby and I have found that this web site is a wonderfull sort of therapy....We want you to understand that everyone here wishes only the best for you....We have 2 Yorkshire Terriers that are all but quarantined from us.....Being animal lovers ourselves we understand your saddness regarding your cats....The only advice I can offer is to " read " all of the posts that are here.....Go back and read them from months ago....I'm sure it will answer alot of questions.....and I'm sure it will raise many questions.....Take care.....Better days ARE comming....Rick of rickndebby
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Post by Spunky on Aug 13, 2005 21:48:55 GMT -5
Hi Karen,
I don't go to any doctor anymore--antiobiotics made Candida fluorish in me, which eventually made me worse. I lost my cat, too, and a hamster--we don't know what happened to our cat, but I think she went to the woods to die (even though she never would venture there before).
Taking Oil of Oregano, Olive Leaf Extract, Sovereign Silver, and Cat's Claw (after reading another post, will now switch to Samento next time round--part of what is in other Cat's Claw Herbs) internally have helped me, along with Dr. Bronner's Peppermint Soap and Safe Solutions Peppermint Enzyme Cleaner (you can bath in it--only takes a little bit in the bath water, and also spray it on your skin, animals and surroundings, and add some to your laundry--borax is good for that, too) externally. Safe Solutions also sells food grade Diatomaceous Earth that you can mix with yogurt to eat and also put in your animal's food (try only a little at first, if they are finicky eaters). The D. Earth helps eliminate internal parasites without danger to your body.
I just bought some menthol crystals to keep in my room--they are supposed to ward off the offenders. I don't have an aroma-diffuser, but plan to put them in a glass bowl.
Others here have healed. I was extremely depressed, too, but have improved dramatically since the onset after doing the things above. I think you will get better, too, by trying things others have found to help, and there is a lot of support here.
I hope you feel better soon. Please don't lose hope. Spunky
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Post by jeffinhburg on Aug 14, 2005 0:04:53 GMT -5
Hi Karen,
Wish I had the energy to say more, but it's been a hot and humid day, the kind that makes the itching and sores worse, and it's 1 in the morning. I just wanted you to know how much the cat situation touched me. Not a day goes by that I don't look at my birds, who have unfairly been confined to their cages for over a year (and probably wonder why I hate them and never play with them anymore), and start to cry. I know if they get infected, there is nothing to treat with that their bodies can handle, and I'm afraid to touch them.
Having pets is supposed to be reassuring and calming, but in this case it's emotional torture, for me - and for them, I'm sure. Everything I torture my body with to try to find something to kill this thing - it's all for the hope that I can hold them again someday and make amends for putting them through this hell.
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Post by ebgbgms on Aug 14, 2005 1:04:58 GMT -5
Never ever loose hope. Karen, U can do this and go through it with us. I'm serious, depression is terriable when something this bizzarre come's into your life. Stay strong and read and relax too. Clean when u can, rest, and find a doc. Somewhere there will be one to help. Please get tested for lyme and only use Igenx or Bowen Labs. The Western Blot is what u need. I'm so sorrry about your cat's, I know it breaks your heart. There was some good advice though from other's. Keep in touch!!!!!!!!!!!! Love, ebgbgms oh, get in touch w/ Kerry so she can help u
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Post by Tara on Aug 14, 2005 4:02:43 GMT -5
Karen
Tears filled my eyes as I read what you have to say I am also in the same boat. I had never heard of this until about 30 min ago and I have had these issues now for over a year, from the time my family and I moved into our new apt. I feel you on you're cat we HAD three of them all in door and about 11 years old. We recently on July 24th had to put one of them down, she was life less and just a bag of bones. until one day I came in and went to pet her and well the fur lifted up and all I could see was her bones as if everything around them and been eaten away. I am not trying to tell you this to upset you even more but to let you know I believe that this has infected my cats and well if this is what happens to them ( granted cats ulcerate a lot faster then humans) then whats to become of my 2 year old and my 9 year old they havent shown signs of this yet. But I wonder whats to become of my husband and I and my Mother who lives with us. I cried everyday sometimes I had no idea why but most of the times I cried because I had no clue what was wrong with me and why this was going on like I don't have enough problems in my life. Now I cry for everyone as well and pry that they come up with a quick solution to this and that no one else gets this crap.
Tara
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Post by TonyM on Aug 14, 2005 4:56:33 GMT -5
Everyone:
You know what, I feel you hun. I've been through that kinda stuff before, and you know what, things WILL get better!!! No more feeling sorryyyyy for yourself!! You have to stay strong to keep Others' going!! There's NO ROOM for quitting!!!! That's NOT allowed!! Get Strong!!! Follow Through!!
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Post by adapted on Aug 14, 2005 5:01:17 GMT -5
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Post by Patti on Aug 14, 2005 9:01:34 GMT -5
Karen,
I can understand how hard it was for you to take that first step and write here....it's hard enough to come to inner terms with this hideous disease without writing about it online. But now that you've done so, let me tell you that instantly you've become a part of "us" and we will always be here for you. (I still consider us all a type of "family", though I don't use those terms anymore because someone recently made mockery of it.)
We have learned that there are definitive cycles to this disease and we all have times when we don't think we can go on.....it affects your brain and it's not your fault. This is a part of the disease and you just need to be strong and get through it the best you can....things always look a little brighter "tomorrow". I realize it's especially bad if there are loved ones involved, whether that be human or pets.....our suffering for them is much worse than our own it seems. But these cycles do pass and understanding this helps us to get through them better.
I wish that I could promise that it's all rainbows ahead but I can't. We don't know what lies ahead for any of us, but I can tell you that many dedicated people who feel our pain are working very hard to solve this. Just hang onto your faith and know that whenever you need a friend, we are here and we DO believe you.
Please take good care of yourself and remember that there is always someone here to help you, day or night. Pretty soon, you will be helping others with your words, which is probably one of the best things we can do for ourselves at this point.
May God bless you and give you peace.
Hugs! Patti
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Post by wolfe1 on Aug 14, 2005 23:59:30 GMT -5
to jeffinhburg, My trusty vet told me that I could put small amounts of ivermectin in my birds water and they would be bug free. Ask your vet and let me know what is said. I'm afraid to try it with my cockateil and finches.
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